Christ, Coffee, and Cornfields

   National Marriage Week is nearly over, and I haven't posted anything....oops. That's not to say I haven't thought about it, though. It's hard to sum up the great blessing that is marriage, but I'll give it a shot. Jordan and I have been married for over 3 years, and boy have we had quite the adventure already!   Unlike the national average, we got married pretty young. I was only 20, and he was 24. Chalk that up to growing up in the Midwest, having strong faith lives, or immediately knowing that marriage was our future together, but we did it. While being young and married has come with its own challenges, it was definitely the right decision for us. We're of the viewpoint that if you know you've found the one to share your life with, and you've discerned this, why wait? We wanted to start our adventure together as soon as we could. At the end of 2017, on a frigid December day (much like today, in fact), Jordan and I entered the Sacrament together and...

   It's been a hot minute since I've written anything....becoming a parent warps your sense of time, I tell ya what! These past few months have been nothing short of magical, though. Being a mom is something I've wanted and prayed for for basically my entire life, and so far it has exceeded my expectations. It helps that our daughter is basically a perfect baby and Jordan is the best husband and dad ever, but still. I know that many women have a difficult time being new moms, and I do not take my experience for granted in the slightest. This is basically going to be a quick rundown of what I've gone through since I last wrote, so snuggle in and enjoy!   First of all, the last month or so of my pregnancy was very uncomfortable. My nausea/vomiting resurrected itself (I don't want Chinese food for a veeeerrrryyyy long time now) and I felt like an elephant. I also had constant Braxton Hicks, which was fine except I was basically psyching myself out every few days, think...

"It'll happen." That is currently by far my most despised saying (followed closely by "get wrecked," but that's a story for another day). I can't tell you how many people have told Jordan and me that. Now, I know that everyone who says it to us means well, but when you're experiencing infertility it isn't something that brings much comfort. Not for me. I'm not writing this to hurt anybody's feelings or to lash out at anyone who has offered consolation to us, at least I don't think so. I don't know, it's really difficult to describe my feelings. One minute I'll be ready to curl up in bed and cry myself to sleep, another I'll rationalize myself into being okay with not being pregnant, and the next I'll be so confused and upset that my prayer up to God becomes more of a shouting match which gets drowned out by the continual questions in my mind. Why us? Why is my body so confusing? Why can't I get a grip? Wi...