Christ, Coffee, and Cornfields

   National Marriage Week is nearly over, and I haven't posted anything....oops. That's not to say I haven't thought about it, though. It's hard to sum up the great blessing that is marriage, but I'll give it a shot. Jordan and I have been married for over 3 years, and boy have we had quite the adventure already!   Unlike the national average, we got married pretty young. I was only 20, and he was 24. Chalk that up to growing up in the Midwest, having strong faith lives, or immediately knowing that marriage was our future together, but we did it. While being young and married has come with its own challenges, it was definitely the right decision for us. We're of the viewpoint that if you know you've found the one to share your life with, and you've discerned this, why wait? We wanted to start our adventure together as soon as we could. At the end of 2017, on a frigid December day (much like today, in fact), Jordan and I entered the Sacrament together and...

   It's been a hot minute since I've written anything....becoming a parent warps your sense of time, I tell ya what! These past few months have been nothing short of magical, though. Being a mom is something I've wanted and prayed for for basically my entire life, and so far it has exceeded my expectations. It helps that our daughter is basically a perfect baby and Jordan is the best husband and dad ever, but still. I know that many women have a difficult time being new moms, and I do not take my experience for granted in the slightest. This is basically going to be a quick rundown of what I've gone through since I last wrote, so snuggle in and enjoy!   First of all, the last month or so of my pregnancy was very uncomfortable. My nausea/vomiting resurrected itself (I don't want Chinese food for a veeeerrrryyyy long time now) and I felt like an elephant. I also had constant Braxton Hicks, which was fine except I was basically psyching myself out every few days, think...

  Jordan and I just celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary. In some ways it feels like we've been married forever because of all we have walked through together, and in other ways it feels like we've only been married a short while because it has just been so wonderful! We are finally expecting our first child, so that has been a big milestone this year. Jordan left the business of paid ministry, which has also been quite a change for both of us. It had been years where either of us was not in active church ministry, but that doesn't mean God is finished with us. Not even close.   Today has been one of those days where Jordan and I have been apart by choice. In that regard, I just mean it hasn't really been due to prior commitments like work or appointments. Things have just come up where we are not together. In a perfect world, we'd be able to do everything together. But we aren't in a perfect world, and that's okay. It has given me a lot of time to sl...

  Let's start with a true story:   Once upon a time, a young girl was told by her parents that she should start to pray for her future husband. They told her that if she was called to marriage, it was important that she start praying for him now because Satan hates marriage. And so, for many years the girl prayed. She prayed that her future husband would follow the Lord, that he would pursue holiness, and that their marriage would be strong and centered on God. During that time, she also started to write letters to him. She didn't know whether or not he even existed, but those letters were an act of faith that God had someone He was preparing for her. Through all of the schoolgirl crushes, loneliness, and failed relationships, she prayed.   And then, one day, he came along. She continued to pray all through their courtship. Now, though, she had a face to the man she'd had on her heart for so long. Soon, they were happily married.  The girl, now a woman, still...

  We have just begun National Infertility Awareness Week, and I thought I'd start it off with telling our story. I've written about our journey within other posts, but this time I'm going to dedicate an entire piece to it. Infertility definitely has the hush factor surrounding it, and it's important to me to break the stigma and to help foster a dialogue. We aren't looking for pity or anything like that; we just want people to be aware that this cross is very real to more couples than you realize.   When Jordan and I got married in December of 2017, we told ourselves that we were going to try to avoid conceiving, at least for a little while, till we could get settled into being married. At the same time, though, we would have been overjoyed at being gifted a child. That's what we told ourselves, anyway. If you look at what our intimacy timing actually was though, we were definitely not trying to avoid getting pregnant. So every month, I was keenly aware that m...

  I've written before how patience is something I would really like more of. Something I'm still working on. Someone once said that God answers us in one of three ways: "yes", "no", or "I have something better"....the last one is code for "just wait." It seems like I get that answer from Him quite often.   It's really frustrating when we don't get the answer we want, and especially when it isn't immediately following our request. This doesn't just pertain to prayer, either. It might be waiting for test results or waiting to hear back on the offer you put in for a house. You may also be waiting for the right person to come along to marry or maybe you're like me and are waiting to become a parent.   Life is full of waiting.   It's inevitable, really. So what do we do when we're faced with a time of waiting? Well, there are two options: you can focus on the wait and stress about it, or you can choose t...

  I was just taking a shower, and it felt like a lightening bolt hit me. God hit me that hard. If you read my previous piece, you'll know that I recently had a personal encounter with Him. Since then, I've felt something different in my life. Something has been brewing. A thought. A realization. An awakening. And I finally got it!!!   I've been looking at my vocation wrong.   For my entire life, I've only ever wanted to be a wife and a mother. To me, those things were inseparable. I think that's why I've been taking this infertility thing so hard. I have been feeling like such a failure as a woman and as a wife. I felt like the cars my dad works on that keep coming back with one more thing wrong with them. Since Wednesday, though, I have been looking at circumstances in a different light. This week is National Marriage Week. It ends on St. Valentine's Day. These things got my gears turning...what if God has been trying to tell me that marriage isn't ...

  I am still in shock that Jordan and I have been married for a year already. It feels like 3 months, if that. As cliche as it sounds, marriage is everything I had ever imagined and more. It helps that I have the most amazing husband and we have an awesome support system surrounding us. We've gone through a lot in the past 12 months, both good and bad. Whenever I sum up our experiences to people, I'm usually met with wide eyes and a "wow." Not every marriage has multiple moves, new jobs, a death of a friend, a fixer upper house project, a serious accident of a sibling, many new health diagnoses, and cross country trips (among lots of other things) within the first 365 days. It has been a whirlwind, for sure! As crazy as it has been, I wouldn't have it any other way. As I write this in bed next to my love, I feel compelled to share what wisdom we have gained from this past year. 1. Marriage is worth waiting for. Every single minute. This is in regards to both sex...

"It'll happen." That is currently by far my most despised saying (followed closely by "get wrecked," but that's a story for another day). I can't tell you how many people have told Jordan and me that. Now, I know that everyone who says it to us means well, but when you're experiencing infertility it isn't something that brings much comfort. Not for me. I'm not writing this to hurt anybody's feelings or to lash out at anyone who has offered consolation to us, at least I don't think so. I don't know, it's really difficult to describe my feelings. One minute I'll be ready to curl up in bed and cry myself to sleep, another I'll rationalize myself into being okay with not being pregnant, and the next I'll be so confused and upset that my prayer up to God becomes more of a shouting match which gets drowned out by the continual questions in my mind. Why us? Why is my body so confusing? Why can't I get a grip? Wi...

We saw "Incredibles 2" last week at the drive-in, and let me just say that it was totally worth waiting over a decade for. It was definitely geared more toward those of us who were kids when the first movie came out, but it was still enjoyable for my younger siblings. As much of a void-filling movie as it is, there were many themes and messages throughout the film that were thought-provoking and refreshing coming from the entertainment industry.   From a critic standpoint, there was at least one major plot hole that is still wide open, and the animation is slightly different. However, that was to be expected since animation styles have changed drastically in recent years and I didn't really notice it as the movie progressed. One thing I thought was absolutely hysterical as a nurse and someone with IBS was the superhero by the name of Reflux. You can about imagine his superpower! Overall, I thought that it was a very worthy sequel to a next to perfect original movie.  ...

  Somehow, Jordan and I have already reached our 6th month of marriage. What a wonderful 6 months it has been! I haven't written a post in a while because we've been so busy and, to be honest, I wasn't sure what to write about. But now with this milestone upon us, I feel that I can credibly speak into what marriage is like.   Being a rather young married couple, we're definitely in the minority both among our peers as well as fellow wedded adults. We have different priorities compared to our unmarried friends, but many veteran couples see us as rookies and that we don't have a whole lot to contribute to married person conversations. Ah, well. That's okay. We'll stay in our little "honeymoon phase" cocoon forever and be blissfully unaware of the challenges of married life. Oh wait....   Actually, we've already dealt with many challenges both big and small. All of the things we've gone through have grown us as people and especially as a...

  I don't think I ever fully realized until yesterday how much I appreciate that Jordan and I share our Catholic Faith. Ever since we started our relationship, faith has been central so it isn't that I never noticed the importance or didn't appreciate it; believe me, I am beyond thankful for it! But Jordan said something yesterday that was very simple but it spoke straight into my heart.   We were sitting in his truck when he said, "Tomorrow is Transfiguration Sunday!"   Yep. That's it. All he did was mention that today is a major feast in the Church. It sounds like a really simple exchange, but it made me realize just how important sharing our Faith is. One could say it transfigured my outlook on the subject.   I have always felt like a nut or a nerd because I love my faith and know a fair amount about it. Nobody in high school shared my excitement when an awesome saint's feast day would come up, very few made the effort to go to Mass on Holy Days,...

  I read a really thought-provoking article by Matt Walsh today. It's actually the second time I've come across it, but it still makes me think. The gist of it is that love, specifically marriage, is a choice. It isn't predetermined and it certainly isn't like in books or movies. Entering the Sacrament of marriage is the most important and life changing decision a person could ever make (besides choosing to follow Christ, obviously). That's just it; it's a decision.   Maybe it hit me a little differently today because I am now reading it as an engaged woman. In less than 8 months, Jordan and I will be eternally binding ourselves to each other. Even though I'm very excited, the magnitude of the commitment we're making can be overwhelming to think about. We need to think about it. The reason I'm choosing to marry Jordan isn't because he's "The One." How could I possibly prove that anyway? I'll be honest here; I used to say that...

  I know I tend to write quite a bit about my love life, but I'm not sorry! I'm passionate about it and about relationships in general, so I keep writing. I have been thinking about how those in romantic relationships, whether it be dating, engagement, or marriage, lean on each other a lot. I'm not saying that's a bad thing; in fact, that's a huge part of relationships. You need to be there for each other. What I have noticed in my own life, though, is the fact that I can't hold Jordan up every time he's down just like he can't do it for me every time. We simply aren't strong enough.   A Christian relationship consists of three entities: one man, one woman, and God. As the Bible says about these relationships, " a cord of three strands is not easily broken ."   Jordan and I are smack in the middle of the most stressful semesters either of us have had, and the strain of school, wedding planning, work, as well as the basic responsibility ...

  Whenever I go grocery shopping and I see Cosmopolitan Magazine on the shelf, I flip it so that nobody will have the temptation to have wandering eyes at the nearly naked woman on the front cover. It's an injustice to expose anyone to a possible occasion of sin, so I flip them. Well, today Cosmo and its atrocities got delivered to my front door.   My dad owns a business, and lately we have been receiving magazines that we have not ever subscribed to. We think they're for his office to entertain customers as they wait, but nonetheless these magazines have shown up at our house uninvited. Today, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to take a peek at what is actually inside Cosmo's covers before throwing it away. I wanted to know if it is really full of the trash I assumed it was...I was right! Immediately as I opened to the first page, I was assaulted by odors that I can only assume are meant to be used as a tool to lure men into the bedroom. I found them rather at...

  What a beautiful and comforting statement. Love is patient . If there's one thing I wish I had more of, it's patience. The so-called "Love Verse" (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) is this plethora of qualities that real love has, and I think patience, which is the first thing listed, is connected to all the other qualities Paul speaks of. It takes patience with yourself to change your ways into not being self-seeking, pompous, or boastful. It takes patience when memories of past wrongs or feeling of jealousy pop up and you have to fight them off. And, man does it take patience when the going gets rough and you are trying to persevere or find hope!   Patience is a vital part of loving.   One of the many things I love about Jordan is the fact that he has a never ending supply of patience, especially within our relationship. When I was single, I made a list of qualities that I wanted in my husband someday. One of the first things I wrote was that he be patient. I desired that...

  Being engaged is one of the most amazing stages of life, but it's also one of the most exasperating! You've found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and you love them with everything you are....well, almost. There's this little "issue" with practicing chastity. Couples who aren't married yet choose to not share their bodies.   This isn't restricted just to engaged couples, either! Jordan and I definitely felt the frustration during our dating period, as well. We have discerned that God wants us to marry each other, so we're moving toward the sacrament. Jordan and I are constantly learning new things about each other, which strengthens and deepens the love we share. The closer we get in a nonphysical way, the more our bodies want to catch up.   The human body is a complex network on multiple planes, and everything is connected. Our minds and souls are connected to our bodies, although the two former aspects of a person are co...